Monday, November 20, 2006

Inevitable?

We survived one deployment to Iraq. It was just the dog and me at home. We were lucky...it was only a 9 month tour and all was well. Is there another one looming in our future? What is our new congress going to do? Go big? Go longer? Go home? Rumors abound. There is no word that he is going. There is no word that he's not going. We're just preparing. Best case scenario is the "honey-do" list will be done. Worst case scenario is the never ending worry between phone calls. Now we have our beautiful little girl with her big brown eyes and little pig tails. His biggest concern is that she isn't going to remember her daddy when he gets home. It may be premature to worry about it now but since the seed has been planted, it's time to work on the garden a little, so to speak. She is going to be 2 soon and I try encourage him by telling him that if/when the deployment comes about, and while he's gone, she will turn 3 and be old enough to know that when she looks at his picture that he is her daddy and he loves her and will be home soon. However, she won't be old enough to know how long "soon" could actually be.

People have always told me I wear a brave face. I do - but only in public. No one saw the tears as I made my commute to and from work. No one knows that I kept something on his side of the bed to put my feet under like I do his legs when he's there with me. Very few know me well enough to know I cry when I hear The Star Spangled Banner and other songs that praise our country. No one knows how much it hurts my heart to hear someone either bashing our military or the mission they are on. Yes, our spouses, family members, loved ones and friends VOLUNTEERED for our military service. Yes, one should know that with that volunteer of service as a career or as a reservist the possibility of deployment or becoming called is there and anyone who doesn't think it could happen to them is viewing life through rose colored glasses. Our military is a volunteer military and every single person should be proud of the jobs the men and women of our country do. The one thing I learned with his first deployment is that you can't see very much from the cheap seats, which is where we all are. Until you've walked a day in a soldier's boots through the sand in 130* + temperatures, you just don't know and, quite frankly, our opinions are just that - opinions. Opinions made on what the media reports. I don't give my opinion of the war one way or the other. I do, however, support my husband, his comrades and all that they stand for. That is what makes me a good wife, a good mother and a good American.

2 comments:

Ed and Lisa said...
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Ed and Lisa said...

Hang in there. My husband used to be Air Force and was part of the first Operation.... Our son was only 15 months old and thank goodness it was just a TDY and he was back in under 4 months. But the feelings I had were smiliar to yours and very real.

Just like your husband, one thing I was concerned about was whether or not Josh would remember his daddy. What I did was take a lot of video and photos and then I showed them to him often. The day my husband returned home, Josh went right in to his arms. That worked for us and others. You may want to go heavy on the photos and video if you can and then if he doesn't get redeployed, you have yourself some extra footage. If he does, you can share them with your little girl.

Lisa :)